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April 23, 2013


Alexander Wilhelmsen

I've felt this way over time while still doing something, even if it's a fraction of what I feel I once did.

The big blows are having ministry opportunities I thought I was doing well in taken away suddenly while the small blows are getting further into my 20s and going "did it matter?" and "What's next?" or seeing the end of one chapter or another that you saw.

My answer to the first question is that "it does" even though it isn't something grand and wonderful or at least in appearance. To the other question... I'm still trying to figure that out and learning that's actually okay... well... not necessarily okay with me though.

I'm in the middle of reading this, along with a couple other books:

I got the idea to read that from someone my age that I'm simply in awe of... which leads me to think, "What's the matter with you?" while also thinking "If someone that amazing is going through the question of 'What's next? What now?' then maybe I'm okay too."

On Paul, that dude had SO many reasons to give up and yet reasons to continue, which are summarized in "Love God, Love People" and his call to tell people about Jesus no matter what becomes of him.

Anyways, the Story of Starfish comes to mind, even as I may not be throwing as many or as often as I once could or feel that I am... or maybe I'm just throwing different ones.

I guess it's like Hebrews 13:2 "Don’t forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it!" or "Don't stop helping and loving others, you never know how you're blessing God and others."

When you want to quit, keep going... and don't forget that you're not alone and getting up is easier and more fun with friends!

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